Oh, and welcome to the party. Better late than never, right?

Anyway, congratulations your guys won … duh, that wasn’t hard after a sitting president with an 18% approval rating. Let’s see how your guy handles it. You know he can’t win, right? No matter what he does, his own party will tear him apart like a lamb chop in a gator pit when the plan goes even slightly awry. I don’t envy any of them … frankly, I don’t know why you would want the job right now. Bush never listened to anyone (except maybe Captain Heart Attack), Palin was a dope, McCain could die at any moment, Biden has tasted his own foot more than any other human, and Obama has never had a real job. He’s the “voice of a nation” now, working for the common people, after being a community organizer, a one-term state senator (in one of the most corrupt political entities on the planet), and one term US Senator who was in office all of 6 months before beginning his run for President. He’s black, but was raised by white women and went to ivy league schools … yeah, he’s a man of the people. Honestly, if he was any other color, would anyone have taken him seriously? I don’t think so. Call me a racist if you like, but facts are facts. A charismatic white guy with no experience would never have made it past Billary in the primaries.

Great work!

peace,
ron

Great work!

peace,
ron

Adviser or Cabinet Member: “Madam Vice President/Acting President Palin, our intelligence shows that the Wahhabis are intent on fomenting an insurrection in Saudi Arabia and the Gulf Emirates, assisted by their south Asian guest workers, who want local economies to de-link from the dollar, since importing our interest rate policies also imports inflation. The governments don’t want to do that because the impact on the dollar could hurt their vast dollar reserves. Yet they have no options to mollify the guest workers. Meanwhile, the Taliban in Afghanistan and Pakistan are using their political leverage to lessen our influence in the region, and are likely to conclude favorable terms with any new Wahhabi governments that form in the region. If you approve of our contingency plans, we need to know which one by (date), so that we can enact it in time to stave off the worst-case scenario. Which one would you like to order?”

Now: which response below sounds more like Sarah Palin’s responses during the debate?

Acting President Palin: “Well, Option A seems to promise less political fallout and greater consensus among local governments, but fails to address discontent among the guest workers. On the other hand, Option B’s economic aid provides only temporary amelioration for guest workers, leaving in place the structural problems that will cause the problem to crop up again later. Secretary (Name), can you draw up a scenario in which the Gulf and Saudi economies can gradually transition so as to float their currencies against a basket of currencies instead of the dollar, without precipitating a sharp decline in the dollar?

Or:

Acting President Palin: “Um–well when you talk about Afghanistan and Pakistan, which are countries that, I’ve lived in Alaska and have not traveled much, but when I think, when you or someone thinks about foreign policy, we don’t want to go in there all wishy-washy and get pushed around. You want to be someone with their cards, their ducks all in a row as far as standing up to someone. I mean, these are terrorists we’re talking about here.”